More than likely, you’ve heard the phrase, “You are who you surround yourself with.”
I’ll admit, I didn’t pay much attention to it growing up as I hung out mainly with my closest friends and family.
When I started college, I made a new set of friends as most of my high school friends ventured off to college (LSU) while I chose to stay closer to home.
I tried joining a fraternity but that didn’t work out. It seemed they wanted the pledges to be at the “frat” house each day after class but at the time, my lawn service was more important (this was my entrepreneur start). 🙂
If I had wanted to spend most of my time partying with the so called “cool” crowd, then I could have surrounded myself with this group of people.
But in college, my goal was getting in dental school which required the highest grades possible. Once I started spending most free time studying in the library, I noticed something.
I began to surround myself with others that shared common goals that were also trying to make the best grades possible for their future selves.
Looking back at my younger self, I now understand that our peer group should be filled with people we want to become like.
It’s hard to achieve a 4.0 GPA by spending time with people that stay up all night partying. Or you can’t expect to hang around people with a negative outlook who don’t believe they’ll ever get ahead and have them not affect you too.
It doesn’t work that way.
“Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do.” – Jim Rohn
The people and ideas we surround ourselves with have implications at all stages of our lives.
It means you should choose your social circles wisely as they can have a much bigger influence on you whether you realize it or not.
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Why Is It Important To Surround Yourself With Good People?
I recently spent a day with mobile home park guru Chris Rood. He’s big on telling others to “buy” your friends.
This way you’re constantly around folks that can be a huge influence in your life as the best friends are the ones you pay for.
As a parent, I’ve instructed my kids to be careful who they hang out with as they can either be a negative or positive influence.
We don’t want our kids to fall in with the wrong crowd, right?
Being around people giving off negative energy can affect our:
- views of society
- expectations you have of yourself
If we know we should teach this to our kids, then why don’t we also use it to our own advantage?
Maybe it’s because we put our kids (and pets) first in our life? 🙂
“Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who’ll argue with you.” – John Wooden
When you surround yourself with a positive person, you’re more likely to adopt their empowering beliefs and notice that life happens FOR instead of TO you.
3 Reasons Why The People You Surround Yourself With Matter
#1. Habits are contagious
Look at the lives of your friends that you hang around. Do you share the same habits? I’d be willing to bet the answer is yes. If they eat fast food and avoid gyms, then you’ll probably do the same.
If they like to gossip about everyone they come in contact with then you might also. If eating junk food, not working out to stay in shape and spreading negative gossip seems normal to you then it’s because of those you’re around.
Is that the life you want?
Look, I’m not saying to get rid of your old friends from high school that you’re tight with. I still enjoy mine I grew up with but seek out those who have the kind of life and career you want.
If you want to be a better person, then find someone that is a better version of you.
I wanted to learn more about mobile home and RV parks, so I sought out Chris Rood.
If you’re in the gym and see someone that’s really in shape and looks like they know what they’re doing then make friends with them.
Find out what they eat and how often they train.
If you stick with them then maybe some of what they have will rub off on you for a better life.
#2. Attitudes are contagious too
If you work with others that are grumpy and constantly complain about everything under the sun, then some of that can rub off on you.
“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.” – Oprah Winfrey
On the other hand, if you’re surrounded by happy, cheerful, upbeat people then your attitude will be more than likely similar to theirs.
That’s human nature. So, consider who you’re around most of the time and then ask yourself if they have attitudes you want to catch.
If not, then are there people in your life that you know would keep you motivated when things get tough? Are there others that constantly inspire you to be your best no matter what? Those with your best interests in mind?
Those are the ones to gravitate to.
#3. Avoid trying to “know” everything
In Dr. Ben Hardy’s book, Who Not How, he states that one thing holding us back from moving forward in life (such as starting a YouTube channel), is getting caught up on the “how“.
I put off starting a YouTube channel for years because I kept asking:
- How will I have time to research topics?
- How do I create scripts, shoot videos and edit?
All you need is an idea or a desire to accomplish something.
“If you can DREAM IT you can DO IT.” – Walt Disney
But instead of letting the “how” hold you back from achieving your goals, seek out the “who’s” that can help.
Here’s the deal. No matter how gifted you are in anything, you can’t figure out everything yourself. Nor should you have to.
There’s plenty of smart people to learn from. I was scared to death approaching a guy many years ago to ask for real estate investing mentorship (billionaires scare me!). Fast forward to today, he’s had a TREMENDOUS impact on my life and was eager to help.
There’s not a month that goes by that I don’t feel a deep sense of gratitude for his willingness to spend this time with me. It’s because of this that I’ve set out to pay this experience forward to others via these articles and YouTube videos.
5 Ways To Surround Yourself With Good People
If you’re self-employed like me, it could become hard to surround yourself with like-minded people that share common interests. I love my employees to death, but none have the entrepreneurial spirit like me.
There’s nothing wrong with that as God made everybody different. To each his own.
Whether you realize it or not, proximity to others is POWERFUL. If you want to become more like certain people, then do everything you can to spend more time with them.
They’ll not only inspire you but will also challenge you if they care about your outcome you’re shooting for.
Here’s 5 ways to surround yourself with the right people….
#1. Make a decision NOW
I spoke with an ER physician this week that was three years out of training. His wife is also a physician, and both were already searching for other streams of income. The pandemic caused hospitals to scrap some of his hours (mind boggling to me) and his wife decided to leave her job due to a “toxic environment.”
These two issues became the catalyst for them to make life changing decisions NOW. His wife wanted to get away from those bringing negativity and distraction into her life.
They both made the decision to surround themselves with positive people to help raise their standards.
What about you? Maybe you’re used to being around the same people and fear making a change.
From my experience, when you choose the kind of people to be around who share similar goals, it elevates the standard of what you’ll tolerate in your life.
#2. Let it go….
As a self-employed periodontist, I’m surrounded by my employees on a daily basis. Their ambitions and mine are different. Which is to say most employers want different things versus their employees. We have a business to run and continue to grow yet most employees only want a steady paycheck.
There’s nothing wrong with this but it is what it is.
Think about the people you hang out with either at work or outside of working hours. Do these people build you up or down? After spending time with them, do you feel good about yourself ready to take on new challenges or emotionally drained?
If you’re worn out, then you’re around the wrong people.
One of the first steps when starting to surround yourself with successful, positive people is to let go of all those negative relationships you currently have.
By doing this, you’ll free up time for the new relationships you’ll be creating.
I get that it can sometimes be uncomfortable to “unfriend” someone that’s not helping you better your life. I also understand that these could be friends you’ve grown up with.
But it’s essential not to feel obligated just because they’re your “high school buddy“ and you think you owe them something.
What’s making you stay in these relationships? Once you change your mindset and free yourself from these negative relationships, you’ll be better prepared to focus on what really matters to you and your business.
#3. Identify good people
Think about all the positive individuals you have relationships with. More than likely all are different and bring a unique outlook to life to you each time you’re around them.
The more groups I join where I’m around ultra successful people (i.e. GoBundance), the more I realize I’ll be able to benefit from a diverse range of personality types.
I’ve noticed four distinct groups that we need to be around to grow:
a. Hard workers
How many people do you know with high ACT scores and 4.0 GPAs that never amounted to what they were capable of? I’ve seen more than my fair share of them. Why does this happen? It’s because success does NOT solely rely on someone being smart. You’ve got to have the hustle and drive to succeed.
If you’re around a hard worker, then it’s hard to not become inspired to do more and achieve more.
b. Smart people
“If you’re the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room.” I don’t know who said that but it’s a great quote. If you’re the smartest person in the room then that means you’re in your comfort zone. You’re under no pressure to try to do more.
Both my kids play tennis. I always tell them the only way to get better is by playing players better than them. If they’re not getting pushed on the court to do their best, then they’ll be complacent.
Same goes with personal growth. By constantly surrounding yourself with people who are smarter than you, it’ll push you to always keep learning and stay curious.
When I hear the word “visionaries” I immediately think of Steve Jobs.
Whenever I’m around someone like this, it opens my mind to start to think and dream bigger.
It also encourages me to go after my dreams no matter how big they are.
d. Positive thinkers
Positive thinking is a mental attitude that focuses on the good and expects results that’ll benefit you. Positive thinkers anticipate success, health, and happiness instead of expecting the worst.
They’re known for utilizing the law of attraction. This is a mindset that creates a positive feedback loop that constantly brings good into your life.
These people can see obstacles as opportunities instead of roadblocks.
When life knocks you down, you want these people by your side.
#4. Join groups for success
It’s amazing how much your outlook on life can expand once you begin to surround yourself daily with successful people.
It took me to joining a mastermind group to see this firsthand.
These new connections helped put to rest my limiting beliefs. And the more I’m around them, the less I want to be around those that have always tried to bring me down.
Another way to surround yourself with successful people is to find a mentor.
I was able to do this in my hometown with a real estate billionaire. The two hours I spent in his office was more beneficial than two years of college. There’s no way you can get life lessons like that anywhere else.
No successful person has ever gotten to where they are by themselves.
Think of it this way: A mentor is someone who is already getting the results you want. They are already living out their game plan for success. And by spending time with them, you can develop one too.
#5. Go outside your comfort zone
“All growth starts at the end of your comfort zone.” – Tony Robbins
If you want to market to a certain niche, how do you do it? You go to where they hang out, right?
You’ve got to answer questions such as:
- What websites or forums are they on?
- What magazines do they read?
Once you find this out, you’ll have better results marketing in those specific areas.
Same goes with finding successful people that’ll take you to the next level. You’ve got to find out where they go and spend time with them there.
Seminars and workshops are great places to start. This is what pushes successful people out of their comfort zones.
Now that you know it takes becoming “uncomfortable” to begin the process of surrounding yourself with good people, there’s no better time to start than with today.Join the Passive Investors Circle